Still Poly/Not Poly: Further Adventures in Relationship Structure Ambivalence
Kirsty
https://www.instagram.com/mskirstyface/
https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/foreverincomplete
Still Poly/Not Poly is a black and white A6 zine about Kirsty’s relationship with relationships, changing views of polyamory,
I’ve reviewed the previous issue Poly/Not Poly: Adventures in Relationship Structure Ambivalence here: (https://www.seagreenzines.com/zine-review-poly-not-poly-adventures-in-relationship-structure-ambivalence/)
I quite enjoyed Poly/Not Poly and was happy to see another zine about the topic. Still Poly/Not Poly was made two years after the first, and, in Kirsty’s usual style, gets right to the topic into the introduction. They write about how things can change in relationships and how, even though they no longer feel the same way on a lot of points, this zine is meant to be an addition rather than a replacement. It may seem a small thing, but I love this to bits and pieces because it sets from the beginning the fact that people can grow and change.
When I started reading this, I immediately remembered how much I like Kirsty’s writing style. They have a way of writing that is so clear, so open and self-aware… Their writing made me think about how some experiences in life must be accompanied by deprogramming our own minds from what we’ve been trained to think and believe.
Kirsty talks about struggling with the ‘monogamy guilt’ (my term, not theirs) as well as their relationship anxiety that stems from internal worries as well as from fears over judgement from others. I feel like, regardless of topic, those feelings are utterly and completely relateable.
“I feel very lucky to have had both of them in my life and I feel proud of myself for fighting my brain for that.”
I think this zine could be one to help people navigate through the very complicated waters of what many of us are taught we ‘should’ want and have in relationships and figuring out what we really do want in relationships. Kirsty doesn’t present this zine as any sort of guide by any means, but, in a way, I see that as all the more reason that it’s helpful.
It’s certainly has me thinking about a lot of things.
Still Poly/Not Poly is another great read from Kirsty that helped open my mind and gave me new perspectives about my own feelings about relationships. I think this and the previous zine are excellent reads for anyone who wants to examine relationships and how they view them.